The Mullet Rule

The Mullet Rule states:

If you are sitting in your car in a parking lot with your husband and kids, singing, “If you’re happy and you know it” to your son, and you see someone in the parking lot who has the hairstyle commonly referred to as The Mullet:

  • Even if the Mullet Person is halfway across the parking lot; and
  • Even if you have your car doors closed and your windows rolled up; and
  • Even if you’re not singing all that loudly

Do NOT make the next verse of the song, “If you’re happy and you know it, say ‘YOU’VE GOT A CRAZY MULLET!’”.

If you do this the Mullet Person will undoubtedly hear you and turn his head your way, then stare at your car for, oh, a good solid 20 seconds before you’re able to pull out of the parking lot. It turns out the Mullet Person has especially good hearing skills, by virtue of the short hair on the side of their head.

Always remember The Mullet Rule.

Kyle on the phone

Kyle spends a lot of time on the phone, having pretend conversations. Here’s a typical conversion:

hello?
hi!
doing?
good!
thank you!
welcome!
bye!